To finish our mighty crawl, we walked about ten steps from Bonita to Brooklyn Public House. After a water break halfway, we opened the door to a lovely neighborhood bar and took our table in a booth by the back. Being handed a menu, I noticed the price. STEEP. Steep for a plate of nachos with nothing outside-the-box about it. I ordered a Coney Island Albino Python based on the name and waited for my chos.

Everyone has a birthday and I’m one of those people. On my birthday, I wanted to do a lot of things, most importantly, eat some delicious nachos. I’d heard good things about the nachos and guacamole up in the UES location of Cilantro’s. I arrived there on a smoking hot afternoon with a certain girl I know and she was ready to eat nachos.

The Public House is your typical Midtown, business lunch restaurant. Which made me wonder why Lee sent me here to try their nachos? [Editor note: bad advice from a blog]. Still, some of these places have good food, our server was cute and friendly, and the restaurant wasn’t crowded with douche bags. So we grabbed a table and ordered a plate of the $14 steak nachos. While the portion was sizable, that is one of the few compliments I can give these cheese-out-of-a-bag, no gauc, almost completely flavorless disgrace.